Wednesday, January 02, 2008

Books You Won't be Reading

Jane Sullivan in the Age lists the books to look out for in 2008 and then is kind enough to list some titles you won't be reading next year including:
The Dirge by Como McCraddock. Award-winning exquisitely written tale of a man and his dog trudging through a nightmare post-apocalyptic world, pursued by cowboy cannibals. In a heart-rending climax, without any commas or apostrophes, the man eats his dog and chokes.

One Loaf White, One Carton Milk by J. K. R. Rowlkien. A hastily jotted shopping list from 1969 from the master of bestselling fantasy, reproduced in loving facsimile, including the coffee ring and the award-winning blot where the biro leaked. A bibliophile's treasure, a commemorative boxed set with marbled endpapers and a 100-page introduction from Harold Bloom.

Pride and Prejudice: The Undead Version by Mina Austen. What if Mr Darcy were a vampire? No wonder Lizzy Bennet takes against him at first. But see how her defences break down when that old black magic gets to work. An award-winning irresistible romance, full of sprigged muslin, quadrilles, tea in the parlour and blood on the pillow.
Of course, her list might just give some authors ideas for their sequel!

Postscript:

I thought this was a hard post to top, but Eyeris comes up with a brilliantly funny list of Malaysian best-sellers you won't see, including one by our favourite health minister come porn star.

Anyone got any more?

2 comments:

savante said...

OMG HIlarious. I can't wait to read what Mina Austen has next for us :P

kamal s said...

Some "titles" you won't find soon:
- Growing Up in Oxford?
- Non-Atonement: Close One Eye!
- The Satanic Perverts ("every month also leak")
- Rude, Ruder, Rudest: The True Story in Kinabinatangan
- Legacy of Rasa Sayange: The Cause of the Next World War
- The Not-so-poisonous Bible

Well, at least I tried!

Btw, you are right! I LOVE Poisonwood.