I don't feel in a position to give advice about writing because, technically, I don't consider myself a writer. I've just fallen into bad habits, habits that have now become the way I work and so far no one's asked for their money back. But if I can offer up a few random things it's these: Trust yourself. You have to start with what you think is funny before you can have the confidence to write to anyone else's brief Give a gag three chances to work, if after three (separate) attempts they're still not laughing, bin it. It's not them. It's you. Don't take criticism personally, take from it what's useful. Apply it and move on to something better. And be brave. No one got anywhere by being too scared to open their mouth in case nobody laughed.
What do you do if you feel that the results of a literary award are :
... a stitch-up ...
(the winner announced before the shortlist is out) and the author you really feel deserves to win a particular literary prize doesn't? How about running off with the prize and holding it randsome as a protest and so that the judges are forced to reconsider their choice?
And what if the prize includes a Gloucester Old Spot pig to be named after the winning novel?
What would P.G. Wodehouse himself have done? What would his hero Bertie Wooster have done? Julian Gough tells the story of a pignapping, and the whole event is caught on video too :
The book Gough wanted to win is a wonderful novella called The Uncommon Reader by Alan Bennett which I so thoroughly enjoyed, that it seems a good opportunity to slip in a mention.
It's the story of how the Queen, out walking her corgis one morning, comes across a strange little van parked in the grounds of Buckingham Palace. It turns out to be a mobile library, patronised by the members of her household staff. She goes in to apologise for the trouble caused by her dogs, but finds herself taking out a novel ... and after she returns it, another ... and then another. And pretty soon a total hopeless bookaddict is born.
The queen's public duties suffer as her passion for reading grows. Worse still, she finds herself asking difficult questions about her role as monarch.
